You seriously never know what you're going to get. For real. I however have been fortunate enough to get some awesome roommates, but the horror stories I hear never cease to amaze me. However, I do have a little experience with the crazies. It all started last year. I was a first semester freshman...well, prospective. I had just finished my senior year and was waiting to hear who my roommates were. I was, as per usual, super nervous and didn’t know what to expect. As soon as I got the letter telling me their names I immediately looked them up on good old facebook. I didn’t hear from one despite my best efforts to contact her (Amy) and the other one was super nice… we will call her… Julie. She was really agreeable on what I like to call “the college trinity”- drinking, sleeping and bunk beds. I asked for the bottom bunk, she said “sure no problem”, I told her my views on drinking, she replied “I’m the exact same”, and we agreed that a “community bed time” would be necessary.
It’s funny how things don’t work out.
I walked into our teeny tiny triple on move in day to the girl I didn’t hear from… and Julie. She was the absolute opposite of what I was expecting. She not only was bickering with her mother in a baby voice, but she used grating phrases like “brrrrrbs” (said as a word and not the abbreviation) and she referred to Amy and I as “girly-q’s” or on one occasion, “Chiquita bananas”. As I would have liked to tell her…Kaitie was sufficient for nicknames, and if she was feeling particularly crazy…Kait.
As the days went on Amy and I realized that she was absolutely nothing like she presented herself on facebook. She started going out and coming back grossly intoxicated at 3 or 4 am the first few nights and the best part about that was that I was on the bottom bunk…below her. It was such a good time to watch her struggle to get to the top bunk without a ladder. It also was a frightening experience because I feared that the bunk would collapse on top of me, because of what I can only assume was the full-cast Riverdance going on above me. As Amy and I got to know each other we realized the one thing we had the most in common- how put off by Julie we were.
As we started meeting people, we kept asking if they liked their roommates, because we didn’t. we then learned, after having visual, and olfactory proof, that her hygiene was terrible. Yes, she showered daily, thank the good lord, but she did not do laundry…ever or change her clothes regularly. Soooo the stench of her sweat from the gym was literally overpowering the air freshener. We had to get out of there. To further prove the smell-factor here is an actual dialogue between my boyfriend and myself:
Me: Hey, I’m so glad you got to come out and visit!
Boyfriend: Me too. I missed you. Hey…what’s that weird smell?
[Julie rounds the corner fresh from the gym]
Julie: Hey guys! What’s up?
You can’t make this stuff up.
So needless to say, after a month of putting our noses and my life at risk, Amy and I moved to another dorm building…and that day is another story for another time.
